Thursday, May 24, 2007

All Engines Reverse, Mr Tidy Bowl Man

Ok, first on a quick note, be sure to scroll down to my Thursday Thirteen. Their are some pictures that I am really proud of and loved sharing.

Now, back to the title, which was my thoughts at about 8:30 this morning. And before you jump to conclusions, my prayer to the porcelain god had nothing to do with overdoing the bourbon the night before. I was bone dry on the alcohol front, I had to pay at least some attention to Lost.

But, their I found myself this morning, after a fitful night of sleep where it felt to me that my stomach had expanded out to about 5 months of baby size, no small feat. I did not get in depth to what exactly was being spewed out of my body, though I can for certain confirm it was pizza related.

And, there is the rub. A few weeks back I determined I was quite lactose intolerant to ricotta cheese. Now it is beginning to appear that I might be allergic to all white cheeses of Italian decent. Which hurts, well beyond the pain of vomitting, because I love pizza, chicken parm, eggplant parm, actually any kind of parm. I can confirm that I might have had one itsy bitsy piece of pizza too many last night, but no more then my usual sitting.

So, what do I do? I am doubting my local hum drum supermarket is going to offer me a large variety of soy based mozzarellas! And while I can and do take lactaid, when it comes to the pizza it may actually call for a carton of Lactaid, which does not sound healthy to me on many other levels. So, all you vegans, vegetarians, moms with kids who have food allergies. I am looking to you for guidance. And maybe to clean up the bathroom??

Oh and by the way, I am feeling better right now, thanks. All set for some cheeseburgers and fries!


Julie Pippert said...

Lactose intolerance is not even close to the same thing as an allergy. I speak from experience.

Lactaid is marvelous thing if you are merely inteolerant of lactose.

If you are allergic? It's a whole new world, baby, and no fun whatsoever. Join the club.

Lactse is an enzyme. Allergic means you can't process the protein.

Trust me...big effing difference.

BTW, if it's an allergy? Check for soy intolerance as well.

Allergy has life-death consequences.

Julie Pippert said...

Errr...geez, excuse typos. Sorry, long day.

Susan Helene Gottfried said...

Oh, geez. Talk about a nightmare, Sparky.

Consult thy doctor. Julie has good points; better to be safe and waste a co-pay than to be dead.

We'd miss you around here! Not to mention Mrs. Duck...

Jay said...

Speak in your most intimidating voice to your lactose intolerance and say: intolerance, I reject thee.

Because, gosh, life without cheese? Is tthat even living at all?

Desert Songbird said...

I actually fear I might lactose intolerant as well. Not a fun thought to entertain for Dutch girl, cheese-addicted me.

The Gal Herself said...

Are you sure it's the lactose? I get similar symptoms but it's tied to stress, grease, caffeine, spicy foods and stress. Did I mention stress? Pizza has been known to send my gut into a tizzy, too. But mine is IBS and I manage it with Immodium and whatever simethicone gel caps are for sale at the drugstore. If you haven't actually spoken to a GP, you might want to. If cutting out a few drinks, a few cigarettes and a few cups of coffee can help, it might preserve your love affair with dairy.