Friday, March 30, 2007

Martha vs Maxine

Real quick, don't forget the clock is ticking on the All About Me book contest, which is still available on the right.

But, now, a forwarded email from Mrs Duck, who got it from the Wombat. Now I am sure plenty of people have seen this before. But its a Friday, who wants a serious email right?



vs.


*Martha's Way*
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice
cream drips.

*Maxine's Way *
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake!
You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it, anyway!

To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the
potatoes.

Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix, keep it in the pantry for up to a year.

When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry
cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the
cake.

Go to the bakery! They'll even decorate it for you.

If you accidentally oversalt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a
peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant
"fix-me-up."

If you oversalt a dish while you are cooking, that's too bad. Please
recite with me the real woman's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and
I don't care how bad it tastes!"

Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will
keep for weeks.

Celery? Never heard of it!

Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a
beautiful glossy finish.

The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites
over the crust so I don't.

Cure for headaches: take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your
forehead. The throbbing will go away.

Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink!

If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves.
They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

Go ask that very cute neighbor if he can open it for you.

Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future
use in casseroles and sauces.

Leftover wine???????????
HELLO !!!!!!!

10 comments:

crowwoman / rhian said...

one guess which way i would lean. Too easy, i know.

Rashenbo said...

Love this :) I think I've seen it before... but I never leave left over wine... or if I do... I'm too .. um, inebriated to think about saving what's left as ice cubes... come on! :)

Anndi said...

Maxine is a wise old broad.

Dragon said...

Thanks for the great laugh!

Wordnerd said...

I'm a cross between the two. How's that?

Peg said...

Oh, this is too good!

I must be channelling maxine when I serve dinner and tell them, "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes!"

Desert Songbird said...

I'm a Maxine kind of gal...pass the tequila, would ya?

Anthony said...

Well, Maxine is more fun, but ... call me sick ... I'd really like to roll around with Martha.
;-)

Tug said...

I love Maxine!!

Mitch McDad said...

Yeah...leftover wine...i don't think so.