Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Maybe TMZ will pick this up

A little fiction suggested by Queen Kukka. Enjoy....


Im Chris Meowthews and your watching Furball. Lots of news to report up in Minnesota, but now we get word that there is a hastily called press conference being put to gether by Miss Kukka-Maria's press liason, Sparky Duck. We go to Minneapolis now for live coverage.

Thank you for coming everyone, I am Sparky Duck, and I have a prepared statement put together by Miss Kukka as well as some of her other people in her public relations staff (read Agent). I will be reading from this statement, to try and dispel some rumors and innuendo being sprayed around, but I will not be taking any other questions.

First, Miss Kukka-Maria will not be running for Senator this year in Minnesota. Or any year for that matter. Especially since she was quoted as saying I cant believe that we have to come here for the Super Sexy Hyper Talented cat convention. That was a mistake, what she meant to say was that I can't believe we dont come here every month.

Second, Miss Kukka-Maria did not say that Mr. Kennedy was as smart as a scratching post and that Ms. Klobuchar needs to find herself some contact lenses. In fact I hate these 3rd party blind quotes being propigated as fact. (a sidelong glance to the agent).

Third, while it is true the Miss KM was and is a proponent of Iams and Purina, and yes being a celebrity, she does have some pull with you bumpkins, er, modest people of Minnesota. But, she has nothing to do with the attempts to make either of those foods mandatory for all cats in Minnesota. Again, nothing could be further from the truth, since Miss Maria would love to sample Innovo, Whiskas and any other cat food product. Please feel free to contact me with an sort of endorsement ideas.

Finally, while it is true, (clearing throat and glaring backstage) since it was caught on tape, that Miss KM did say she cant believe you all had a Wrestler as Governor, she was on a prescription for catnip and was not in the right frame of mind when the quote was taken. The catnip is strictly medicinal, for a slight pulled muscle in her back, though not, I repeat not, due to any gaining of any weight!

Now, if anyone would like, there are autographed pictures on the back table on the way out, but again, I will say that there will not be any further comments from Miss KM until this convention is over, which by the way has not gotten enough media coverage that is for sure.


Kukka-Maria said...

Checking in...still at my conference. Great scoop! TMZ would be lucky to get the rites to your tale!

I can't wait to see what the celebrity judging committee decides next week!

Keep your ears perked for more scandals!